How to Negotiate a Sugar Daddy Arrangement

Q: What’s the best way to ask for monthly support?

Use soft language. Say things like 'How do you prefer to support your sugar baby?' or 'What kind of arrangement are you looking for?'

photo without faces of man and woman with champagne celebrating

📌 Editor’s Note (2025 Refresh): This post was updated to guide Malaysian sugar babies on setting clear, confident boundaries when discussing sugar daddy arrangements. Communication = key.

Before you agree to anything, it’s important to discuss allowance, expectations, and boundaries. This 2025 guide walks Malaysian sugar babies through smart negotiation steps.

At Sugarbook, a Malaysia-based platform, we believe in the power of negotiating your sugar daddy arrangement honestly and openly. Whether you’re in Kuala Lumpur, Penang, Johor Bahru, or anywhere across the country, you’re probably here to seek companionship, financial support, mentorship or a mix of everything. However, not everyone knows how to get what they want in an honest relationship.

Whether you’re a sugar daddy, sugar mommy or sugar baby, you only need to follow these simple steps to get started. Stop thinking within the confines of traditional Malaysian dating norms, and read this with an open mind.

Table of Contents

#1 – Honest, Transparent Relationships

The first thing to do is to stop faking it.

Malaysians sign-up at Sugarbook because they are tired of the endless swiping on local dating apps. They are tired of playing games. If you think sugar dating is about cheesy pickup lines, misleading others, or being someone you’re not in order to impress, stop now.

We believe in honest & transparent relationships, where both parties state what they want. What do you want?

Chances are, you’ve never really put it into words.

On a piece of paper, write, “Here’s what I want” and list down everything you can think of. You can also state what you do not want if you feel strongly about it. Examples:

I want a partner to hang out with on weekends and watch Netflix
I want successful businessmen in Malaysia who are not too demanding of my time
I do not want people who smoke or are doing drugs
I do not want men who are married or with kids

There’s no right or wrong. These are just the things YOU want and will be the basis of your arrangement going forward.

#2 – State Your Ideal Sugar Daddy Arrangement

We have provided sections in the profile page where you can clearly state who you are (in About Me) and what exactly are you seeking (in What I’m Looking For). Most people—especially within the Malaysian sugar dating scene—will read these two sections, and decide if they should start a chat with you.

Remember, you don’t need to pretend to be someone you are not. Are you overweight, transgender, gay, married, divorced, with kids, OCD, or bad at small talk?

Just say it. People either want you for who you are, or they don’t. Sugarbook has over 300,000 members, including many Malaysians and expats based in cities like KL, Selangor, and Penang. It’s better to seek the ones who want you for what you are than to mislead them.

#3 – Be Direct But Respectful in Your Chats

Firstly, you need to be very comfortable with yourself. Be clear and direct. If you are not keen on sex right off the bat but could consider the notion—maybe after meeting to see whether there’s any chemistry—then say so. If you’re not keen on sex at all, be clear and firm about it. Remember not to allow them to sway you. Consent is key.

Tuck the ego away, and keep the discussion results-oriented. Be considerate and flexible. Here’s a guide on how to approach your potential Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby, and seal the deal quickly.

Always show respect and understanding of the other party. This applies especially in Malaysia’s cultural context where mutual respect is highly valued. We are in no rush here. It is better to find a Sugar Baby or Sugar Daddy who can agree to the terms you provided rather than get into any heated arguments later.

Most importantly, keep the conversation going online before providing private contact information. Until you reach an agreement about your Sugar Daddy arrangement, maintain contact through the messaging system. That keeps you a safe distance until you both get to know each other better.

Of course, you may want to meet the person—perhaps in a public cafe in KLCC or a quiet spot in Mont Kiara—before you start talking terms to check for chemistry. You can make this choice based on your own judgment.

Upgrade to a Premium account to enjoy unlimited messages, and you can also see who viewed and liked your profile, which narrows your chances of landing a successful Sugar Daddy arrangement right here in Malaysia.

FAQ

Q1. Can I bring up allowance early in the chat?
A1. Yes – just do it respectfully. Wait until you both vibe, then ask about expectations and comfort levels.

Q2. What’s the best way to ask for monthly support?
A2. Use soft language. Say things like “How do you prefer to support your sugar baby?” or “What kind of arrangement are you looking for?”

Q3. What if he avoids the topic or gives vague answers?
A3. That’s a red flag. A real sugar daddy will be open and direct about his budget and intentions.

Q4. Can I set boundaries about texting, meetups, or exclusivity?
A4. Absolutely! Your boundaries matter. Talk about communication style, availability, and what you’re not comfortable with.

Q5. What platform is best to find sugar daddies who respect boundaries?
A5. Sugarbook – it’s Malaysia-based, has verified users, and lets you filter by intent (NSA, long-term, etc.).